Tuesday, January 01, 2008

In addition to a life, she may want to get a dictionary...

You know, after searching high and low for many months, I have yet to find the following words in any reputable English dictionary:

Obviously, a secure grasp of the English language is one of the many attributes Anonymouth sorely lacks.

Based upon this apparent inability to spell, I must say I'm impressed that she did, in fact, spell the word illegitimate correctly. How unfortunate that it is used improperly.

One can only assume that her familiarity with the behaviors of bartenders is a direct result of her penchant for imbibing in an overly indulgent manner. Self-medication is a slippery slope. Perhaps her expertise in what I can only surmise is a reference to bottom-feeders, is a direct result of cannonballing her excessive posterior into the primordial ooze that is her social realm.

Gentle reader, let us not judge too harshly those who believe that the world owes them more than they are themselves willing to contribute. A character so rife with pain and disenchantment as Anonymouth's is to be pitied, not judged. The gutters along the road to hell are teeming with the odious abominations that spew past the lips of such feral, wretched creatures. 'Tis indeed a wonder that any living being within the venomous radius of her voice does not tremble with revulsion and loathing.

Rather than recoil from her thinly-veiled threats, I stand tall and proud. Karmic energies are precise and righteous in their delivery, and I have no fear of retribution in that regard. Alas, I cannot help but lament the fate of Anonymouth for, indeed, "what goes around, comes around." Those of her ilk inevitably find themselves trampled face-first in their own excrement by the very souls they profess to hold dear.

Anonymouth would also be well advised to remember that the internet provides a veritable feast of evidence of all manner of indiscretions...some dating back to the very naissence of the worldwide web. Let she who is without sin cast the first stone...